Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Autopilot

This weekend rolled around and we realized that we had an entire day that we didn't have anything planned.  I am not sure when the last time this happened, I think it was the middle of summer when we last enjoyed a day to do whatever we wanted.  I am talking the entire day.  It is days like this when you can relax and just take in the day as it comes.  We lounged around had breakfast and moved to the outside as quickly as our relaxed state of mind would let us.  My girl and Denis worked on the yard while me and my boy made some good use of the driveway.  We got some basketball in and my boy even rode his bike up and down the sidewalk.  My boy is getting to the age when we just need to expect more from him when it comes to doing things for himself and I think it takes a day like this when we aren't focused on getting somewhere and being on a schedule to realize that I am not teaching him his self help skills like I should be.  My boy wanted me to steer his bike and then that lead me to notice other things that I do automatically for him and really I am on autopilot when it comes to the day to day stuff with him.  It all starts with me getting him a drink without him asking, getting him dressed and helping him into the car.  I don't think about this stuff I just do it.  That is how it has always been and to be honest I think it will be hard to switch my gears but when he decided he wanted to go outside without any clothes on and not caring that he didn't have any clothes on made me think have I taught him that clothes are needed before we go outside.  The simple task of teaching him the thing that he puts on is a shirt have I over looked all these little things that you think are something that is just known.  You need clothes and so this is where my carefree day thoughts ended up.  Me worrying that I need to focus more on his self help skills.  My thoughts are often cluttered with worrying about schedules and do we have enough pizza crust and bread made for my boy to eat and how is he doing in school and what can I do to keep him from just sitting in front of the TV for hours at a time, not does he know what a shirt is and can he put it on.  I am awake now to this little detail and that is usually how it works for me.  I do so much until I guess I can squish one more thing in to focus on.  The only thing wrong with this is I will probably drop something else that I was doing to make this fit into my things to worry about.  I am like that.  I can only deal with so much and the other stuff just gets ignored.  The thing is he is totally capable of doing everything that I would ask of him with a little effort from both of us.  He would have to want to and try.  That is always the challenge with him and I think that is how I got to be on autopilot for so long.  So a day of nothing is what it took to get me off autopilot.  I am not sure when the next day of nothing will be but we sure did enjoy this one.

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